…What would it be?
Imagine if there were a superhero school, where you could go to learn all their tricks. Kind of like Hogwarts, but instead of spells you could be taught how to fly, or to become invisible, or to run at the speed of light, or to travel through time and space…
Actually, the one superhero skill I’d like to learn is somewhat more mundane. I’d like the ability to get changed on the spot – like Wonder Woman does, or even Superman (although I think I’d have to find somewhere other than a phone box – do they even exist anymore?)
Whenever I’m going out anywhere, or even just going to work, I don’t like to cycle in the clothes I’m going to wear when I get there. They’d just get dirty, sweaty or wet – or, on a really good day, all three. So the first thing I do whenever I arrive pretty much anywhere is nip off to the loo to get changed.
It’s not that I mind this so much – although it can be a hassle, and some loos can be pretty grim. It’s the fact that, no matter what I’m wearing, I will always look as if I’ve just stepped off my bike.
My hair, flattened down by my helmet, will invariably be desperately in need of attention.
My cycling jacket – usually the only one I have with me – will never be considered stylish, however plummily purple it may be.
My red Ortlieb pannier bag, though certainly practical, could never be described as discreet or glamorous.
My clothes will almost certainly be full of creases from being squashed into said bag. If I’m really lucky, they’ll have acquired a couple of grease stains en route.
My face will always be make-up free. I never wear any when I’m cycling – that’s just an invitation for it to run and smear across my face. (Yes, I could put it on when I get there, but that takes time. And it also takes me remembering to bring my make up bag…)
My outfit will probably be lacking certain elements – like my favourite necklace, or the shoes that really go with my dress. Or maybe those tights I thought were black turn out to be green. That’s what happens when I have to throw things in my bag – usually in the morning half-light when I’m still half asleep – rather than actually put them on.
In short, whenever I cycle anywhere, no matter where I am or what I’m doing, I will never look as fabulous as I want to.
So you see why I find the idea of just spinning round and round and being magically transformed so appealing.
I mean, instant fabulousness – who wouldn’t want it?